2001-03-15 - 19:12:39
Gold, Gold, Gold, Gold
Have I mentioned Get a Gold Membership yet? Oh wait, I think I did.
But even if you ignored me last time, it's not too late! Don't you want your very own very cool banner ad? Don't you want to see the wacky google searches that lead people to your diary? Don't you want to FEEL THE LURVE???
(Hm, maybe I did spend too much time listening to pledge week...)
I have, however, been discriminated against because of my size (I know there were jobs I didn't get offered during the Great Job Hunt of 1999 because I am an unrepentant fat chick), but that doesn't mean I assume that all skinny people are out to get me. Unless, of course, all you skinny people really are out to get me, which means my tin-foil hat isn't working properly again...
I also have enough self-esteem to not feel as if my precious gimp identity is threatened by another gimpís success--and enough of a clue to know that spending every waking hour in a funk, or writing po-mo screeds about "Politicizing Our Sexual Oppression" (that was actually the title of an essay in one of the gimp mags a few years back--I shit you not) wonít get me any action.
Stuff with entries which undoubtedly read like this: "Last night my significant other tied me to the doorknob and we pretended to be Bert and Ernie from Sesame Street! And tomorrow we're going to hit each other with these really great dowels we picked up at Home Depot!" Yeah. That wouldn't get old fast. Aphrodite farts in their general direction.
I have always wondered if "ironing" would be the thing that would do us in after the honeymoon phase ends.
The man on the 5th floor was carrying a large box downstairs. We have been eyeing each other for months. "I hate these stairs." He says to me "Yes, that is why I keep my umbrella in the mailbox." I responded.