2004-03-05 - 2:51 p.m.
Verdant penis quotes
Ebay is full of crap that i never before knew existed, but that i now need desperately. multiply this by my premenstrual mindset and you have me screaming and crying on the floor because i didnt win an auction for a purse shaped like a cat.
From Tvzero (Submitted by Chris):
Life is a lot like Paris Hilton in the sex video - dull, lifeless and more than a little dumb.
From Quarters (Submitted by Kurt):
why can i never heed the signs, even when they're right in my face, slapping my cheeks with their penis in a less-than-seductive manner?...maybe i watch too much porn...
Iím not sure if this city grows on you, but it definitely wears you down to the point where you finally say 'OK, fine! I live here. I accept your freeways and constant sunshine.'
Clearly chivalry is dead, gone, buried, had it's tomb ransacked, had a bulldozer trample the cemetary to put up a parking lot and is now residence to the blue Pacer that never seems to leave.
I also discovered that cats are complete shit at telling scary stories. The scariest story they could think of was the time they were fed nearly an hour late and they all thought they were going to die of starvation.