2003-01-04 - 4:46 p.m.
Happy New Year!
Hey… pssst… you there reading Quoted. Got a quote that you’d like to suggest? Excellent. If so, you need to include the URL of the exact entry you’re quoting. And if you submit an URL that looks like this:
it works the day you submitted it, but the very next time that diarist decides to update, suddenly that fabulous little snipped that you loved so much is now somewhere in the archives and when I go to check links before an update, then I’m all “What the” and you’re all “well duh…” and I’m all “huh well…so there” and then it’s all “so, um, yeah….”
Whoa. Don’t know what just happened there. I seem to have channeled my inner idiot. Let's just put that behind us and never speak of it again, shall we?
If something IS on the index and you can’t find the real URL, just go to their Older page and then reclick the most recent entry, which will bring you to the correct URL instead of the index.
Oh speaking of recognizing clever and unique writing, did you know that there was another cool neato place to nominate your favorite Diarist, Entry, or Layout? Yeah, it’s the Diarist Awards and nominations are going on until January 16th. That is one of the highest honors available to Diarists, sort of like the Academy Awards, since nomination and voting are done by other diarists. So yeah, you’ve got to have a diary with an active URL to nominate someone. But it’s cool. Trust me.
Now the Quotes:
There is nothing quite like a crowded Wal-Mart before the holidays to make you want to just give all your money to charity and spend all of December 25 drunk and thinkin' about Jesus.
Happily ever after is not guaranteed. Results may vary. See Prozac packaging for more information. Treatment more effective if therapy is accompanied by vodka, sleeping pills and a vibrator. Close proximity to a gun not suggested.
To all the People in Diaryland: Please stop updating your diaries so my wife will come to bed.
But once I embraced this day, swallowed it, ,sequestered it in my soul.. it felt kind of funny. Good concept, bad execution. It's Pepsi Blue.
Being English, it is taken for granted by the rest of the planet that we just don't do sex. It's not proper. What's that you say, old boy? Continuation of the species? What on earth is that? Sounds like something the Jerry's thought up. Strikes me as a touch frightful, truth be known. What say we just have some tea and forget the whole pallaver? Oh jolly good show.
Next Thursday, we go with them to Grandad's physical therapy center. They're getting some sort of computerized speech tool. It allows us to program things into the machine and then he can communicate by pressing buttons....Grandmom's thinking they'll program it with things like "hungry," "thirsty," "tired," "have to use the bathroom," etc. I'm thinking I also need to make sure he has a little fun with it. He should be able to push a button to say "Kiss my ass," for example.
At the end of the show tonight, as he band was walking offstage, (singer) Phil's last words to the crowd were, "eat pussy till your teeth rot out," and this girl that was standing in front of me turned to her boyfriend and said, "yeah."
I must at least convey this thought that bounced through my head faster and harder than Tigger on viagra.
I haven't worn my tinfoil hat in a week and those paranoid rays from the government are probably wrecking havoc on my brain.